The little girl from next door cried every Sunday night for an entire year. She would sit alone at the kitchen table with her math homework out in front of her, sobbing away. She didn’t know why she was crying and her mom didn’t know what to do with her either. It was as if she was going through a phase and it would all eventually pass. It didn’t. Her mom finally realized that her daughter was about 8 months behind in math. The girl also firmly believed that she was just “bad” at math.
By the time her mom figured out that her daughter was suffering, the girl had fallen 8 months behind in math. In addition to the academic fall, she had developed the conviction that she was just “not a math person”. It took her entire 5th school year to figure out that she was suffering. And that it was not normal for her to cry every Sunday night because of math homework.
The signs aren’t always what you expect
Struggling to do math problems can manifest itself in very obvious ways before the slow leaks of failure begin to reveal themselves on a child’s report card. However, when combined with a child’s generally negative self perception these obvious signs can mean that failure is inevitable. Some of the obvious signs of a child not being able to do math are: producing consistently wrong answers for a variety of different math problems, and avoidance of math homework (or other similar work) due to fear of not doing it right. A child convinced that they are “just bad at math” will convince themselves that they are wrong for a variety of different reasons (e.g. wrong calculation, wrong answer, etc.).
Parents are more likely to recognize the emotional signs of their child’s failure in math before they recognize the decrease in their child’s academic performance. Some of the common signs of a child’s failure in math are:
- Sudden reluctance to sit down with homework, especially on nights when math is assigned
- Frustration that seems wildly disproportionate to the task (“It’s just a worksheet” suddenly triggers a full meltdown)
- Complaints of stomachaches or headaches before tests, anxiety wearing a physical costume
- Vague, deflecting answers when you ask how class went: “fine,” followed immediately by a subject change
None of the characteristics above indicate that a student may be failing in math, but a combination of many of them indicate trouble.
Falling grades are a lagging indicator
People can get so stuck on the child’s grade that they make one numerical value out to be this huge issue when really, it’s just smoke and mirrors. The grade is just a superficial way of indicating whether a child has a good grasp of math or not. But really, the actual issue lies beneath the surface of that single letter or number. The issue typically is with a particular concept that the child never quite got a handle on. Perhaps they were glossed over in class, and no one really paid much attention to whether or not the child was actually getting it. And then before you know it, months have passed.
By the time a child’s falling grades become apparent, the problem has been brewing for months. The reason for this is the way that math is a structured subject. Just as a house needs a strong foundation in order to stand, a child’s prior math education needs to have a strong foundation in order for them to do well in subsequent math classes. If a child has a weak grasp of a prior math concept, then they are likely to have a tough time with later math concepts that build on top of that prior concept. For example, a child with a weak grasp of the concept of fractions will likely have a tough time with concepts such as decimals, percentages, and even algebra. As a result, by the time a child hits a snag with one of these concepts, the entire structure of their prior math education may seem to be crumbling around them.
Now the issue of low scores on math tests. If your child is receiving very low scores on their math tests, do not ask your child why they did not study for the test. Instead take a look at the test your child received and go through each problem that your child solved incorrectly. Identify each mistake made by your child on each incorrect problem. Use those mistakes made by your child to understand the mistakes and work through the correct solution to each problem. Those mistakes will serve as a map for your child’s errors on each problem and help your child to understand and get correct the material that they are having a problem with.
Step 6: Weak Foundations – What’s Going On?
Children who have weak math foundations may appear to be completing problems that look like work that they have practiced at home. However, when given a problem that looks very similar to another problem that they have completed before, they may be unable to complete the new problem. It is as if they have a switch that they can turn on and off, and when the switch is off they are unable to complete problems that appear to be identical to others that they have completed.
So how would you test for this at home? For starters, have your kid explain his/her solution to a given problem. Then ask for an even more detailed explanation for how he/she got to that answer. It’s a very simple test but it will reveal a lot about your child’s math education. If a child has a solid grasp of a given math concept, then he/she will be able to explain how he/she arrived at any given answer for any problem that tests that same math concept. On the other hand, a child who has been memorizing step by step procedures to solve different types of math problems will not be able to explain how he/she arrived at a given answer. In fact, all that kid will be able to say is that he/she followed the steps to solving a given type of problem and that is how he/she arrived at that given answer. So they would say something to the effect of, I don’t know, that’s just how you do it.
Weaknesses in a child’s math foundations can be addressed
| Behavior | Might mean | Worth exploring if… |
| Avoids math homework | Anxiety or low confidence | It happens consistently, not just once |
| Gets answers right but can’t explain how | Memorization without understanding | They struggle when problem format changes |
| Grades slipping over one or two terms | Foundation gaps catching up | The teacher hasn’t flagged specific issues yet |
| Shuts down during timed tests | Test anxiety layered over skill gaps | Performance in class looks different from test results |
When to Intervene
Some parents wait for their child’s teacher to notice a child’s struggle with a particular math concept. Others wait until their child receives a very poor grade on a test. While there is merit in both of these approaches, math gaps do not wait for anyone. By the time your child’s grade has plummeted, your child has likely been struggling for months or even longer with one or more concepts.
Two or more of the following signs of struggling in math mean that your child may need some help. Weaknesses in math can create a very negative identity for kids. They can develop the fixed mindset that math person’s have. This can be very damaging. This identity can be created by you. So be very careful with your words. Don’t ever say “math is hard” even with the best of intentions. Don’t ever say “I’m not a math person” even with the best of intentions. The kid will take this as gospel.
Individual one-on-one tutoring, therefore, is far better than group tutoring, since the tutor can discover where a student is going wrong, and then work from there. If you reside in Newark, for example, then I can introduce you to two excellent math tutors in Newark who, as tutors, work in exactly this fashion. That two of these math tutors for students in Newark have been recommended by several families from Fremont, follows from the fact that the work of these two math tutors for students in Newark is analogous to that offered by the excellent math tutor for students in Fremont, described here.
A word about what not to do
I am also strongly against saying that math is hard. Even when it is expressed sympathetically or in the best of intentions it can cause a great deal of harm. I know many parents who have said “I was never any good at math” to their children with the intention of being kind. But these children take their parents at their word and begin to build their identities around not being good at math. It can have a negative impact on their self esteem for many years. It is far better to say something like “Let’s look at that together and I am sure we will figure it out” or “I don’t know that either. But I am sure we can look it up together and find out.”
(Also, beware of saying that math is just not for everyone – yes, I know this is a very delicate area but in fact it is a door closer for lots of kids – so be very careful of any comment that might be interpreted as giving up on them before you have even begun to support them).
Just because your child has not asked for help with math does not mean you are doing nothing. Many children do not know that they need help with math and are too afraid to ask.
- Watch the behavior patterns, not just the grades
- Study the actual errors on their tests and assignments
- Ask them to explain their thinking out loud, unprompted
- Get targeted support before the gap has time to widen into something daunting
Why is a child who is struggling in math having problems with their current math work? The reason that a child who is struggling in math is having problems with current work is because the current problems have roots in earlier problems that the child was unable to understand. This means that the problems that a child is having in math today are being caused by current mathematical misunderstandings and/or deficiencies as well as by anxiety and/or loss of confidence in math as a result of past mistakes and/or struggles. In short, the struggles that a child is having in current math work have their roots in earlier work.
Also Read: The Hidden Advantage of Hiring a Local Los Angeles Math Tutor
